When was the last time you heard or used the word kinship? What does it mean to you?
The common definition is that kinship refers to people who are kin, whether through blood or marriage.
It can also be defined as people who are tied together by social groups. In the article Kinship in Sociology: Definition in the Study of Sociology,1 kinship is also discussed as “the degree of sharing likelihood among individuals from different communities.” For instance, if two people have many similarities between them then both of them do have a bond of kinship.
I feel like we have moved away from that. It used to be that being an American created kinship with other Americans. Even if we disagreed politically, we still had that common bond. Having that bond allowed us to discuss touchy subjects without verbally abusing each other. We could worship different deities (or choose not to) without fear of radical violent acts that would harm us or our neighbors. I’m not saying that there weren’t occasional shootings and assassinations, but it was not an almost daily news headline like it is now. And when it did happen, the country came together to mourn. People were horrified, outraged and shocked by this aberration from our otherwise “polite society.” We seem to have become numb to it now.
If, indeed, we have lost the sense of kinship with our fellow Americans, this is not only sad, it also bodes poorly for our future. The article mentioned above also tells us: “Kinship is one of the most important organizing components of society. … This social institution ties individuals and groups together and establishes a relationship among them.
Psychology states that if you feel no connection with someone, or a group of someones, then it’s easier to dehumanize them. That, in turn, makes it easier to hate them or even justify treating them badly, also known as moral disengagement.
This is being used as a tool to boost support for, and legitimize the tactics of, the current administration. When the elected representatives are all over the airwaves and internet exhibiting this behavior, it makes sense that it will lead to the rise in destructive tendencies among society that we are now seeing.
We must make the choice to not normalize this attitude of indifference to the humanity of those not in a certain party, a particular ethnic group or a specific religion. We can reach out to others and appeal to their shared patriotism if we have nothing else in common with them, and rekindle a sense of kinship. As Americans who love our country, which has been a basis of kinship for 250 years, it is our obligation to at least try.
While we don’t have the reach that the White House does, we do have the ability to reject outright their destructive rhetoric. And when you are part of a group that has kinship, it inspires the members to stick together against that rhetoric. That is kryptonite to autocracy. They govern from a place of fear, and hearing chants of “The people, united, will never be defeated!” is the stuff of their nightmares.